So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
