things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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