I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
