everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
