We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
