What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
