i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Vodka?
Forever.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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