i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
PANTIES FOUND
Randomize
