I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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