She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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