I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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