so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
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he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
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she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!