it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
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It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
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