I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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