They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Randomize
