And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
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