Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
