So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
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