once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
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