A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
