they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
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you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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