are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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