so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
It's shark week go big or go home
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
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