I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Randomize
