I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I am naked and annoyed.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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