): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
