Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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