New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
