I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Randomize
