Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
apparently the secret to your success is patron
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize