i can't believe i had my finger in that
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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