I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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