i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
