You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
