A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
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I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
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We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering