'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
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how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
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I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.