I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
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