Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
