im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
