Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
home. puking in laundry basket.
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I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
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I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
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