entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
