I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Do vagina's smell?
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Randomize
