all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
you had me at cake vodka
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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