There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
