brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
