White coat. Heels.
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Randomize