I am spending my child support on dildos
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
