u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize