Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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