hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize