i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Randomize
