my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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